The Celery Farmer

Celery is a profane fruit, and those who grow it are the scourge of humanity.

Once a long time ago after the desertion of man from the All-Father their was a man who grew celery. Celery was not seen as a negative force in the world because without the guidance of the All-Father man was ignorant of the harms of celery and ate it in large numbers.
For this reason celery farmers existed, and passed their foul trade down from father to son. One of such farmers was named Harry. Harry grew much celery. He was one of the main contributors of evil to the world. The celery he grew were long and had large shafts. They were shaftastic.
The All-Father destroyed him and his profane fruits.